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Unread 01-12-2019, 10:37 AM
Bunker Buster
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waynes ear's
United fans
Beer smellers
Beards
Taxi drivers
Bald people
Women

f*** off
5ft 4" barmen with a god complex.
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 11:07 AM
est.1878
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zorg
This elf on a shelf balls.

Shit off
Had 70+ messages on the parents wap group about this the other night

People getting stressed out by it and tip sheets flying round

The only way this stops is if fbook goes down
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 11:17 AM
Zorg
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by est.1878
Had 70+ messages on the parents wap group about this the other night

People getting stressed out by it and tip sheets flying round

The only way this stops is if fbook goes down
Wait, what? I thought it was just a meme and that was bad enough. There's more to it?
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 11:18 AM
NedKelly
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zorg
Wait, what? I thought it was just a meme and that was bad enough. There's more to it?
Was it not just the video thing where people could impose their friendís head on top of dancing elves? Or am I more out of touch than I already thought I was?
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 11:19 AM
est.1878
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by My Name is Heath
Humblebragging.

Got to shag Kelly Brook this weekend ffs.

Anyone know anything about getting a Porsche insured?

Bloody hate the letters Goldman Sachs send when my fund increases another £5m


The menu in the exec seats today is the same as it was for Brighton and there's only two things I really like on it

The zip on my Canada goose coat is too small for me to unzip without taking off my articthermal100000 gloves off when I get overheated in the apres ski bar

Got a load of air miles to use up before December so I'm gonna have to go on a weekend trip to Iceland, AGAIN, even tho work is mad busy with commission deals coming in
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 11:20 AM
Bunker Buster
 
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It's an elf that arrives Dec 1st.

Each night it returns to the north pole to tell santa if you've been good.
Each morning when it returns it's been a bit cheeky itself .

(Toilet roll down the stairs, moustaches drawn on kids)
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 12:13 PM
Drexl
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bunker Buster
It's an elf that arrives Dec 1st.

Each night it returns to the north pole to tell santa if you've been good.
Each morning when it returns it's been a bit cheeky itself .

(Toilet roll down the stairs, moustaches drawn on kids)
that sounds pretty bloody brilliant tbf
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 12:26 PM
rubbernecker
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Albert Tatlock
You've never drunk a Belgian trappist ?
Drunk the lot Albert . That's the point though I did drink therm instead of pontificating .sampling the bouquet and then talking shit all night about it as if I was some connoisseur.

Not only that but the c***s take 4 times as long to be served after they've run through the descriptions of 500 beers and then tasted 20 of them before deciding on the raspberry and liquorice cider
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 12:34 PM
waynes ear's
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bunker Buster
5ft 4" barmen with a god complex.
If the bar staff are shorter than the bar, they shouldnt be behind the bar.

f***ing el hombre c***s
 
Unread 01-12-2019, 01:09 PM
rubbernecker
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by waynes ear's
If the bar staff are shorter than the bar, they shouldnt be behind the bar.

f***ing el hombre c***s




Never drank in the Hobbit Bar then ?
 
Unread 02-12-2019, 10:40 AM
shenwen
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by My Name is Heath
Humblebragging.

Got to shag Kelly Brook this weekend ffs.

Anyone know anything about getting a Porsche insured?

Bloody hate the letters Goldman Sachs send when my fund increases another £5m
Lad I used to work with posting on LinkedIn about how he failed his targets during 2018 (but of course failure is just part of growth). Only managed an 80km ultra run and not the 100km he aimed for.

Now thatís humble bragging. LinkedIn is awash with it. Awful place full of humble brags, proud and surprised to receive an award no-one cares about (and which 90% of the time are paid for) and motivational quotes from Richard Branson.
 
Unread 02-12-2019, 12:56 PM
est.1878
 
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Someone inviting you out and failing to disclose they've booked the next day off
 
Unread 02-12-2019, 02:50 PM
Spock
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by rubbernecker




Never drank in the Hobbit Bar then ?
Is that the one in Manila, been a few times on trips from HK
 
Unread 02-12-2019, 03:11 PM
rubbernecker
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spock
Is that the one in Manila, been a few times on trips from HK

That's the one .

One of Marlon's fave watering holes when he was filming Apocalypse Now
 
Unread 02-12-2019, 04:50 PM
est.1878
 
Default

Office busy body has tinselled the office and approximately 0.05 % of my screens are covered
 
Unread 04-12-2019, 07:08 PM
Lazlo Panaflex
 
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That rapinoe bird for the US women's team.

Never heard her talk/saw her play football. Just the pics of her. Never seen someone look so in love with themselves.
 
Unread 04-12-2019, 08:52 PM
Poop
 
Default

Rewiring a f***ing triple light switch. Mother got electrocuted in the kitchen yesterday so I had a look and the switch was falling to pieces inside. Took pics, rewired it exactly as it was, though I had to put a new neutral bit in which I assume is what is causing the f***ing landing lights upstairs to come on when I switch on the kitchen light. And for some reason the living room switch turns off the kitchen light.

Absolute nonsense. Electrician will call tomorrow and charge her fifty quid for ten minutes work I assume.
 
Unread 04-12-2019, 09:22 PM
Fat Al
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Poop
Rewiring a f***ing triple light switch. Mother got electrocuted in the kitchen yesterday so I had a look and the switch was falling to pieces inside. Took pics, rewired it exactly as it was, though I had to put a new neutral bit in which I assume is what is causing the f***ing landing lights upstairs to come on when I switch on the kitchen light. And for some reason the living room switch turns off the kitchen light.

Absolute nonsense. Electrician will call tomorrow and charge her fifty quid for ten minutes work I assume.
Electricity = Witchcraft
 
Unread 05-12-2019, 08:52 AM
Cream
 
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Poop
Rewiring a f***ing triple light switch. Mother got electrocuted in the kitchen yesterday so I had a look and the switch was falling to pieces inside. Took pics, rewired it exactly as it was, though I had to put a new neutral bit in which I assume is what is causing the f***ing landing lights upstairs to come on when I switch on the kitchen light. And for some reason the living room switch turns off the kitchen light.

Absolute nonsense. Electrician will call tomorrow and charge her fifty quid for ten minutes work I assume.
You were in my dream last night. Showed up acting all weird. I asked you your name and you wouldn't disclose, so I suggested Seamus, which you seemed ok with.

Weird c***.

Those tw*ts who shove the free paper through your letterbox and leave it lodged in there, creating a freezing cold draught for potentially hours on end.

'Aw, imagine having to do that for a living in all weathers?'

They're freezing old women to death!
 
Unread 05-12-2019, 08:59 AM
My Name is Heath
 
Thumbs down

Going to work because I have to do it to get paid.

WTF? I was late to bed last night and I'm tired, have a minor headache.
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