Manchester United v Bournemouth - EPL 3pm 09/12/23 - Official Match Thread

Originally Posted by believe

Was that meant to say FT?

No, YouTube. I think the crew on here are generally more sussed. I am not saying we shouldn't enjoy a result but it's £#%&!ing ridiculous how they chase clicks and spin things on those channels.

Struggling to process yesterday’s result. A true low point.

Originally Posted by Hyman_Roth

Struggling to process yesterday’s result. A true low point.

Brave words, given our next league game.

Originally Posted by Hyman_Roth

Struggling to process yesterday’s result. A true low point.

Yep. Made worse by the dangled carrot of hope. We’ve followed good performances and results at Everton and Chelsea with two of the worst performances/results of recent years. With a crushingly disappointing result in Turkey that ended our CL hopes thrown into the mix too. Some serious Jekyll and Hyde shit in the space of two weeks.

Originally Posted by Finport Red

Brave words, given our next league game.

Think Bruno missing might be a blessing. The guy is an absolute fanny when he wants to be. Not suggesting we will win - we’ll be easily beaten but I don’t think it will be a cricket score. Losing at Anfield is expected tbh - being @#%&!ted by Bournemouth at home after beating Chelsea isn’t.

Originally Posted by Dr Stranger

Yep. Made worse by the dangled carrot of hope. We’ve followed good performances and results at Everton and Chelsea with two of the worst performances/results of recent years. With a crushingly disappointing result in Turkey that ended our CL hopes thrown into the mix too. Some serious Jekyll and Hyde shit in the space of two weeks.

Yep.

Originally Posted by Hyman_Roth

Think Bruno missing might be a blessing. The guy is an absolute fanny when he wants to be. Not suggesting we will win - we’ll be easily beaten but I don’t think it will be a cricket score. Losing at Anfield is expected tbh - being @#%&!ted by Bournemouth at home after beating Chelsea isn’t.



Yep.

Agree 100% on Bruno. Too much hero ball, not enough graft and teamwork.

Originally Posted by Dr Stranger

Yep. Made worse by the dangled carrot of hope. We’ve followed good performances and results at Everton and Chelsea with two of the worst performances/results of recent years. With a crushingly disappointing result in Turkey that ended our CL hopes thrown into the mix too. Some serious Jekyll and Hyde shit in the space of two weeks.

Was genuinely excited about the game yesterday. Ah well, back to enduring games rather than enjoying them.

Originally Posted by Hyman_Roth

Struggling to process yesterday’s result. A true low point.

It’s not like I thought the Chelsea result meant we’d suddenly start knocking the ball around like prime 1970 Brazil, but it did look like we’d turned a corner. And then that.

I'm not sure why people were so impressed by the performance against Chelsea. We were lucky to be winning at half time and all the problems we see regularly this season were present. They were woeful at finishing the many chances they created. We were the better team in the second half when their players stopped playing.

They're an awful team who are missing 11 first team players through injury. They play open football and were too stupid to change the way they play against us. It was the perfect opponent for us.

Originally Posted by Hyman_Roth

Struggling to process yesterday’s result. A true low point.

Originally Posted by VanHaaksbergen

it may be the last reply you get from me

that would be awesome. we aren't failing to score because we are set up to defend, you ridiculous clown. we are failing to score because our stupid forward overload crew don't know how to play together. they all know how to cut inside and shoot, but not how to look up. we don't know what to do with possession.

Originally Posted by Dr Stranger

We’ve followed good performances and results at Everton and Chelsea with two of the worst performances/results of recent years. With a crushingly disappointing result in Turkey that ended our CL hopes thrown into the mix too. Some serious Jekyll and Hyde shit in the space of two weeks.

I don't get the hope. the performances against everton and chelsea weren't great. we were wide open and either team could have scored a hatful. everton's finishing was particularly woeful. it's absolutely not jekyll and hyde - we've been playing the same way all season (wolves, forest, etc). it was easy to see how bournemouth - a not great team, but who know their jobs - could give us trouble. their finishing was better than it was in midweek, but they didn't do anything clever. they defended and picked us off.

our stupid near 5-0-5 set-up and "tactics" (ie: relying on moments of brilliance or mysterious serendipity) are shit. it might work if we had 10 galacticos, but..... it would be fair to say we don't.

Originally Posted by Lok

I'm not sure why people were so impressed by the performance against Chelsea. We were lucky to be winning at half time and all the problems we see regularly this season were present. They were woeful at finishing the many chances they created. We were the better team in the second half when their players stopped playing.

They're an awful team who are missing 11 first team players through injury. They play open football and were too stupid to change the way they play against us. It was the perfect opponent for us.

true dat. the bits about us, anyway.

Originally Posted by Finport Red

Agree 100% on Bruno. Too much hero ball, not enough graft and teamwork.

£#%&! me the bloke runs his socks off, imagine looking up and one pass is to The Scottish Player another to Maguire and one to the bloke marking Martial. Or Dalot.

The lack of movement was terrible, yet against Chelsea it was good.

Performances against Everton and Chelsea were by no means perfect, but they were considerably better. Same in Gala. We should have won that comfortably. We were at least creating chances and playing good football. They felt flawed, but something to build on. Then we have the Newcastle game and yesterday where we just look utterly devoid of anything.

Originally Posted by jem

that would be awesome. we aren't failing to score because we are set up to defend, you ridiculous clown. we are failing to score because our stupid forward overload crew don't know how to play together. they all know how to cut inside and shoot, but not how to look up. we don't know what to do with possession.

One would hope that even in your hovel, the most fundamentally basic of all statistics may sink in.

Presumably you think it is utterly random that a team has the most clean sheets across a 56 game sample size while also having the worst attacking numbers respective for their position in first 18 then 49 year periods. That this is all the by product of chance, and not that the defence performs well regardless of personnel and the attack performs badly regardless of personnel because the manager sets the team up so. Similar to how your ancestors were confused when water fell from the sky.

Keep squealing your rhetoric. You are intellectually bereft of understanding or engaging with a single piece of data beyond your own low-IQ biases.

Originally Posted by VanHaaksbergen

One would hope that even in your hovel, the most fundamentally basic of all statistics may sink in.

Presumably you think it is utterly random that a team has the most clean sheets across a 56 game sample size while also having the worst attacking numbers respective for their position in first 18 then 49 year periods. That this is all the by product of chance, and not that the defence performs well regardless of personnel and the attack performs badly regardless of personnel because the manager sets the team up so. Similar to how your ancestors were confused when water fell from the sky.

Keep squealing your rhetoric. You are intellectually bereft of understanding or engaging with a single piece of data beyond your own low-IQ biases.

You’re conflating outcome with intent, there is no data on the latter and so the eye-test is the only way to judge. I can’t say I’ve noticed us setting up defensively but considering we are utterly woeful at the creative/attacking part of the game it might be an idea to start keeping it tight and take the pressure off the attack because it’s clear they’re shit.

Not going to take that are you Jem?

Originally Posted by VanHaaksbergen

One would hope that even in your hovel, the most fundamentally basic of all statistics may sink in.

Presumably you think it is utterly random that a team has the most clean sheets across a 56 game sample size while also having the worst attacking numbers respective for their position in first 18 then 49 year periods. That this is all the by product of chance, and not that the defence performs well regardless of personnel and the attack performs badly regardless of personnel because the manager sets the team up so. Similar to how your ancestors were confused when water fell from the sky.

Keep squealing your rhetoric. You are intellectually bereft of understanding or engaging with a single piece of data beyond your own low-IQ biases.

there's a shark being jumped somewhere. not quite sure when, but you know when it's happened.

Originally Posted by shenwen

I'd stopped watching. Even having them as options is testament to where we are at.

Again, owners who give a shit would have ensured DvB had been disposed of long ago.

Originally Posted by Chris Quayd

You’re conflating outcome with intent, there is no data on the latter and so the eye-test is the only way to judge. I can’t say I’ve noticed us setting up defensively but considering we are utterly woeful at the creative/attacking part of the game it might be an idea to start keeping it tight and take the pressure off the attack because it’s clear they’re shit.

We're 8th for average-possession. For context, Ten Hag records less possession than both Mourinho & Ole's teams, two notorious counter-attack merchants. This team does not want the football.

For further context, Brighton & Hove Albion average almost 10% more possession than we do. They've also scored 29 more goals in the past 54 games. It is utterly unacceptable.

To compound the above, we're recording fewer 10-pass-build up sequences than even Ragnick's side. We're at the historical nadir: lower than last season, and lower than Ole's team.

Not only do we not want the ball in possession, once we have it we want to get rid of it up the pitch as quickly as possible. This is redolent of a Stoke City of yester-year, or a Crystal Palace esque outfit. Hence we score so few goals.

He's effectively an enormous fraud. Because he is Dutch, it is presumed that he wants to play possession-based, intricate passing football. That is not at all what Ten Hag is about. He's far closer to a Roy Hodgson in his outlook and how he sets the team up. The football is terrible, and that comes from the manager's tactics.

Originally Posted by VanHaaksbergen

We're 8th for average-possession. For context, Ten Hag records less possession than both Mourinho & Ole's teams, two notorious counter-attack merchants. This team does not want the football. For further context, Brighton & Hove Albion average almost 10% more possession than we do.

To compound the above, we're recording fewer 10-pass-build up sequences than even Ragnick's side. We're at the historical nadir: lower than last season, and lower than Ole's team.

Not only do we not want the ball in possession, once we have it we want to get rid of it up the pitch as quickly as possible. This is redolent of a Stoke City of yester-year, or a Crystal Palace esque outfit. Hence we score so few goals.

He's effectively an enormous fraud. Because he is Dutch, it is presumed that he wants to play possession-based, intricate passing football. That is not at all what Ten Hag is about. He's far closer to a Roy Hodgson in his outlook and how he sets the team up. The football is terrible, and that comes from the manager's tactics.

Jesus....