- Most PL games ever lost in a season, and it's April.
- 2nd worst in the shots conceded per 90 out of all the 96 teams in Europe's Top 5 leagues.
- Most shots conceded at Old Trafford, ever in a game.
- Most goals conceded by an English club in the CL group stage.
- Worst start to the PL campaign since 1962.
- Haven't won a big 6 away game in more than 2 years.
- Lost to Chelsea for the first time since 2017.
- Lost 5 of their first 10 games at Old Trafford since 1931.
- Newcastle hadn't won a cup game against Manchester United since 1994.
- Lost twice in a row to Newcastle for the first time since 1972.
- Lost 5 of the opening 10 league games for the first time in 36 years.
- Galatasaray hadn't won a game on English soil in 117 years of existence.
It’s the same lot who’ll sit there and say “we need to give this manager time” the moment the next one rolls up.
Can picture them in front of their laptops, Cheeto dust running down their Primark sweatshirt, living in their mum’s basement, used plates stacked up on their desk with stale fried chicken giving a refined twist to the usual smell of damp and mould that has become totally normalised to them.
“Hi Coracao sweetie, do you want some chicken tendies?” His mother calls through from the other side of the barricaded door; she’s been broken down by years of this behaviour but she has to keep trying.
“£#%&! off mummy,” comes the reply, vitriol dripping from his voice. “I hate you and I hate Erik Ten Hag!”
“Ok dear,” she replies in resignation. She places the plate on the floor outside, and leaves a bottle of ketchup there too. As she walks away, she hears the door open briefly, a clammy, grey hand grabbing the plate before the world outside is immediately shut back out.