i took a football on the eyeball last night

and now i've only got about 50% vision in my left eye. the bottom half is just darkness and a strange aura and it doesn't go dark when i shut my eye - it looks like a psychodelic kaleidoscope. the top half is misty like a steamed up window. needless to say i'm typing this with one eye shut and waiting for a lift to the eye hospital.

















i will take a dim view (boom boom) of anyone posting pictures of mad eye moody, marty feldman, etc.

gaaahrr

in all seriousness make sure you get there quick, had a mate who took a thunderbolt of a free kick in his face, suffered a complete loss of vision in his left eye and died a few days later

Originally Posted by Ginlarde

in all seriousness make sure you get there quick, had a mate who took a thunderbolt of a free kick in his face, suffered a complete loss of vision in his left eye and died a few days later

I heard about that. Posting on the net finished him off.

Originally Posted by Ginlarde

in all seriousness make sure you get there quick, had a mate who took a thunderbolt of a free kick in his face, suffered a complete loss of vision in his left eye and died a few days later

U @#%&!!

Could be a detatched retina mate.

Originally Posted by Rossi the Red

U @#%&!!

eh? i didnt take the free kick.

Originally Posted by King Schlong

Could be a detatched retina mate.

i thought "sugar ray leonard" as soon as it happened.

Originally Posted by Ginlarde

in all seriousness make sure you get there quick, had a mate who took a thunderbolt of a free kick in his face, suffered a complete loss of vision in his left eye and died a few days later

Yeah, no way the poor @#%&! could have seen that car coming

Originally Posted by BryanRobson'sLiver

Yeah, no way the poor @#%&! could have seen that car coming

show a bit of respect

All the best Irk - hope it isn't a detached retina.

Keith

Originally Posted by irk

i thought "sugar ray leonard" as soon as it happened.

Sounds like thats what it could be to me.

Full or partial loss of the field of vision. This is rather like a curtain or veil falling over part of the eye
“Floaters”. Most people experience dark, tadpole-like “floaters” from time to time, but the sudden and sustained appearance of floaters is cause for concern
Brief flashes of light in the eye
A sudden change or blurring of vision. The cornea and the lens in the eye focus the image on the retina. If part of the retina has moved, the image at that point will be blurred

Aslong as you get it seen to right away, there is a good chance that there shouldn't be no lasting damage. Right away though means TODAY!

Nasty injury, but it can be cured. Good luck if it is what im thinking.

Originally Posted by King Schlong

Most people experience dark, tadpole-like “floaters” from time to time

i experienced a couple this morning

Originally Posted by BryanRobson'sLiver

Yeah, no way the poor @#%&! could have seen that car coming

disrespectful or not that was brilliant

a quick update for you as i just know you have spent the last day in a near frenzy of concern for my peeper.

i spent all day in manchester eye hospital. in a waiting room with various other sorry looking, squinting red-eyed victims of chance. there was one young guy sat there with his somewhat £#%&!gable girlfriend. i disliked him instantly and not just out of jealousy. you see he was one of those @#%&!s in the i'm-trendy-identikit-outfit of those £#%&!ing awful aviator shades, skinny jeans, and a palestinian scarf.

anyway, i cut him some slack because giving his bird my killer sex look wasn't an option in my depleted condition, and because i wished i had had the sense to bring my sunglasses; a serious eye injury is the only excuse to wear sungiggs indoors.

imagine then my surprise as his bird was the one called through for triage. @#%&!. i'd have landed my sweet sweet left hook on him right there and then but it's impossible to judge distance with one eye and he was clearly dressed like a sissy.

before i attended i'd have put money on it being bad for the eye to have really bright lights shone directly into it, but that is what they do. repeatedly. after taking your eyeball pressure with a tyre gauge, making you read umpteen wall charts (i have discovered the vision in my right eye is comparable with that of the terminator). then they dilate your eye with drops that make the little you can see looks like an over-exposed photograph, gives you a sharp headache, and makes you wonder which malevolent sadist decided that garish yellow was the appropriate colour scheme for the waiting room, and shine some brighter lights in your eye. for much much longer.

when they shine the lighthouse level searchlight in your eye at a certain angle you can see the back of your own eye.

the result is i have a bruised retina, blood spots, and a little bit of the gel in my eye has become detached at the back. i have to rest, stay off work, do no sport, and go back in a few days.

any flashing lights, or shadows and i should go straight back.

i was extremely stoic in the face of this treatment, and had something of jaap stam's impassive cool when he was having his eyebrow stitched at the world cup. although, i must admit to being a little perturbed when i overheard the tired-looking doctor say of the previous patient what sounded like: "it'll have to come out", and then roll up his sleeves. it was quite a relief to see him and an orderley lift the guy out of his wheelchair while they manoeuvered him out of the consultancy room.

You certainly relay a good account Irk.

You should have @#%&!ted him though.

enough - I really enjoyed that

Glad you'll be ok though - but one thing has been bothering me.

Did the doctor take off your paper bag before examining you

Originally Posted by Jez Quigley

enough - I really enjoyed that

Glad you'll be ok though - but one thing has been bothering me.

Did the doctor take off your paper bag before examining you

serious faux pas, dude. that is my actual head.

Originally Posted by irk

serious faux pas, dude. that is my actual head.

hope this doesnt sound a bit callous, but, could you not just draw another eye on your head? or doesnt it work like that