If I was to give you 2 billion pounds

Originally Posted by thenorthwillriseagain

the ground:
only one stand with seats, the rest all terracing, no more advertising boards which move and flash big £#%&! off messages every 5 seconds, the wonderfuel gas sign back on the stretty, no more exec boxes if you want to do business do it in an office you @#%&!s
tickets:
bring back lmtb, no ACS, anything above £15 quid is overpriced, sort it(and that's being generous)
catering:
no budweiser, plastic pint pots like the rugby, also at least cut the price by 4 quid per pint, pies and bovril only maybe chips as well,
the staff:
£#%&! the prima donnas off and only have players who want to play for us,
the owners:
give the club to the fans like barca and £#%&! off back to tampa you £#%&!ing parasites
stewards:
make them fully licensed and also not arsed about a bit of swearing just be there for the stuff that's actually important, in fact no we can police ourselves just £#%&! off and get a proper job


i posted that on Fred Tissue a while ago

you think we would be challenging with you at the helm???

we would have a shit tem of salford lads with skinheads, united tattoos who all play like lee cattermore.

Originally Posted by ScholesScoresGoals2

whopper

I'd have them being served at half time too.

Originally Posted by marlo

-i open a community bar for the younger trendier reds to come. the players would come there afterwards to enjoy a laugh with the cool fans...

-id build more boxes at ot afor rich reds to enjoy.

-id have stands for different regions. (north stand will be for northerners with just beer and seats,nothing else.....south stand would be for the southerners and would have decent bars, straws available, good food, snacks.....east stand for people from the far east and anyone else and then the west stand would be just boxes and exec seats for the 'reds who got £££'

-id also get top us artists to perform at half time and also before the matches.

-cheerleaders are a must

Get some original material. This is getting beyond boring now.

Standing behind each goal (2000 per end).
No shirt sponsor.
Hang the DJ, Hang the DJ, Hang the DJ.
Work to reduce the average age of the matchgoing red through local school/community initiativeslike at FC
Bars only selling Joey Holts Bitter and Hoegaarden
A slide out pitch like in Sapporo.
Proper fans forum and full accountability.
Statue for Fergie when he retires.
Decent stewards, not @#%&!s.

That'll do for starters

Originally Posted by marlo

-i open a community bar for the younger trendier reds to come. the players would come there afterwards to enjoy a laugh with the cool fans...

-id build more boxes at ot afor rich reds to enjoy.

-id have stands for different regions. (north stand will be for northerners with just beer and seats,nothing else.....south stand would be for the southerners and would have decent bars, straws available, good food, snacks.....east stand for people from the far east and anyone else and then the west stand would be just boxes and exec seats for the 'reds who got £££'

-id also get top us artists to perform at half time and also before the matches.

-cheerleaders are a must

Originally Posted by marlo

-i open a community bar for the younger trendier reds to come. the players would come there afterwards to enjoy a laugh with the cool fans...

-id build more boxes at ot afor rich reds to enjoy.

-id have stands for different regions. (north stand will be for northerners with just beer and seats,nothing else.....south stand would be for the southerners and would have decent bars, straws available, good food, snacks.....east stand for people from the far east and anyone else and then the west stand would be just boxes and exec seats for the 'reds who got £££'

-id also get top us artists to perform at half time and also before the matches.

-cheerleaders are a must

Ladies and Gentlemen, Welcome to the Ed Hardy Superdome

Yawn

Originally Posted by Smeggs

Ladies and Gentlemen, Welcome to the Ed Hardy Superdome

Yawn

'wasssup maaaanchester,,,,,wait a minute.....i cant hear y'all i said wassssupppp manchester........ ....thats better........y'all ready to kick liverpools butt on the pitch........... ok...i got a little something to get y'all in the mood for this narley game yo........get up out your seats and tell the person next to you to 'give you room'......introducing..............all the way from atl.....soulja boooooooy..........'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iK1L8JvLLmc

Originally Posted by marlo

who all play like lee cattermore.

Like Tevez mate?

The immediate things

- No shirt sponsors
- Badge back to what it was
- Classy timeless kit that'd we wear for the next 3-4 years
- Removal of awful white seats that spell out Nike/Umbro etc.. I want a vast sea of red seats.
- No music or loud tannoying
- Exec seats removed from middle of Stretford, Disabled section relocated to the South Stand
- No other events at Old Trafford other than Manchester United matches or training sessions

The within 6 months things

New larger ticket office to be rebuilt over in the carpark... because ( like it used to be in Spain ) 10% of all matchday tickets to be sold within the 24 hours leading up to the match - therefore queuing space needed..

Most expensive oridinary seats to be no more than £25-£30, the bulk of seats to be in the £15 range for adults and £5 for kids, however hospitality packages and boxes to be increased.

Open Training sessions at OT during School Holidays

The Longer term things

Redevelop South Stand giving a capacity of approximately 95,000. The general facade to Old Trafford to be tidied up and de-tackyfied.

Far more stringent and self-imposed wage structure to be implemented gradually. I don't see any of the lads going short but we need to set the lead, and besides they'll have a meal ticket for life afterwards anyway. Playing for United should be an honour, the Holy Grail.

Originally Posted by Fountz

- Badge back to what it was

Which though?

I think I'd keep Fred The Red but would have koppas permanently sewn into the costume and he has to sleep on the pitch with just a Lee Sharpe duvet.

I would cancel all ST's and make people re-apply in a Masterfred fashion. It would just be one dish but it would have to be accompanied with old photo's in unted kits and a brief letter about how you came to be a United fan and your greatest memories.

Originally Posted by marlo

'wasssup maaaanchester,,,,,wait a minute.....i cant hear y'all i said wassssupppp manchester........ ....thats better........y'all ready to kick liverpools butt on the pitch........... ok...i got a little something to get y'all in the mood for this narley game yo........get up out your seats and tell the person next to you to 'give you room'......introducing..............all the way from atl.....soulja boooooooy..........'

I went to Rochdale v Stockport at Wembley last year and it was honestly not far off that.

'Rrrrrrrochdalllle.......arrreee....yyyyouuu.....r rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreREADYYYYYY!'

Cringeworthy at the best of times but in a 75% empty, vast stadium it was even worse.